I just wanted to know what u all thought about our culture.

Meaning .. ..  family , weddings funerals and ect. . . .

Ill start with khatams/ fatihas.. . .!

When I think of khatam/fatiha . . .  one should go there dressed appropraitely , sit very quite and either listen to someone read the koran or read it ourself. Make duwa and then if they are ur close relative sit and eat then go home!

I have gone to some lately . I dont know y , but they spend more on fatihas and khatams than a wedding these days. The food is similar to wedding buffet. The only ppl that are actually reading the quran sharif and making duwa are the elders. The rest seems like they are attending some sort of a party /hang out or wedding .The fashion is unblieveable. Girls put so much makeup and act like they are in a fashion show. .  tight pants, hair is half coverd , giggling talking outloud . Guys are outside smoking talking politics and checking out girls lolz!.Iam not saying this is wrong to do , but I think that everthing has its place.  

So what do u think . . . is this part of our culture?

Salam Mariam jan ;-)

nice topic! Well I share this opinion with you. I also heard alot about it. Some people are spending exactly that much money for a fathia as wedding party. In my opinion it never makes sense. If we really want to do some think good for "rohe murda" then we have to spent money for people who really need that money and who will pray for dead person.

I think we have to think deeply about our culture and traditions which are not compatibel with today's life. We have to consider the wedding parties, the way how we live ect.. some people especially in USA dont live for them selve therefor they live for another people. The person with big house big car is better then someone who dont want to spent money in this case.

Why is money too important for us??? unfortunatly most afghans are not normal!!!

I knew u were going to be the first to reply T Jaan.. . .

It is kinda true  here in VA . If one buys a car the other will make sure their's is better. If one buys a house with one garage  the other family or freind will make sure they get one  with 2 lolz and same goes with the wedding and birthdays. . . .. Its very rare that u see families spend time together anymore . Its all bz of these ridiculous expences.

True Mariam jan ;-) actually i am really very busy these days but as I read your post I couldnt get off without any comment ;-)

One more thing I forgot to write. In most cases we try to do something just for another people. We do it because we think they wont "gap nazanan" about you. Like example a couple dont want to have a namzadi party so that is their decision but there are lots of discussions about another people. Allah gap mezanan ;-)) I am not care about another people :-) but unfortunatly I dont have this right to do things in the way how I like to do it.

Its really stupid!!

Post deleted by admin! 

This Topic is about Afghan culture. Stopp insulting someone personally!!

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GREAT TOPIC FULL OF SELF POSITIVE CRITISISM AND IT  IS A FREE WORLD FOR EVERYONE TO EXPRESS HIMSELF FREELY WITHOUT  BEEING TERRORISED OR THREATENED ! 

Dear Temorian and Mariam;

we have the same culture here too when it comes to Fetha and weddings !! changing cultures needs lots of patience BUT IT WILL HAPPEN regardless of any mental terrorism ;)  Keep on the good discussion and I am sure 100% that

MATTY  THE WINNER ALWAYS will join  you very very very soon and will have his say too :) :) ;)

Interestin my Maro jan!

1st i apolgise for lackin in "gosssipin" lol i mean keepin in touch!

anyways...with my family my mother caters for women that come down,

 However recently it been said dont give food to people when they read in kathams..because it like "they read the Quran but are rewarded by food" .. therfore my mother who gave a "kirat" for meas i got better just catered and told them if they want to read yassin for me at their own pace and time at home whenever...

(DONT ARGUE WITH WHAT I SAID someone pointed it out which i think may be a islamic rule ...i personaly havent cheaked so dont u dare shot me sayin im wrong)

 The day turned out welll.we coooked rice, tandoori rotay, meat "landapal" and it was a lovely day even with me rushin about,

And yeah if giving food on Khatms and everythin it should be "water, dates, fruit"...

next should be discussed Death, and then wedding and so on! ( so I think)

anyways my Homey i shall leave ya to it.. muahax people